"Damn." To the human eye, Hibiki Ryouga appeared to simply poke at a nearby rock. However, to anybody that really knew him, his bakusai tenketsu-- his special attack that would render any inanimate object that his index finger would strike into pieces, was what was being performed. Ryouga had gotten rather good at the attack. Back when he was first learning it, he had considerable trouble, smashing into boulders a good number of times before he could muster enough focus to get it right. Now his bakusai tenketsu came without flaw. Especially when he was angry. This was one of these times, as the rock that was once there was now a pile of pebbles. "Where in the hell are my chopsticks?" Ryouga reached into his bag, pulling out things like packages of Cup-o-Noodles, to clean socks, to matches, and a kettle. However, Ryouga didn't pull out his trusty plastic chopsticks.
He frowned and sat back. "Must have left them in Okinawa, or something." His eyes wandered to the clear sky above, and how its colors of blue-violet, yellow and red swirled about like melted ice cream. Just noticing a single star in the sky, Ryouga made a wish. "I wish that Akari-chan and I will have love everlasting." Ryouga smiled a nostalgic smile as his mind wandered to thoughts about Akane, and Ranma. "And," Ryouga thought, wincing to himself, "I also wish that Akane-san will have true happiness with Ranma... er, of course, just because of Akane-san." Not thinking about the cup of instant noodles that were still in his hand, Ryouga shifted, spilling chicken broth all over his lap.
"Scratch that," Ryouga said aloud. "I wish that I had my chopsticks. Then I wouldn't be wearing my dinner..." Ryouga thought about this and chuckled to himself as he reached in his pack for a towel.
"My, what a kind man you are," A soft, airy voice
pierced the silence of the night, as Ryouga looked up with caution. Before
Ryouga stood a woman that looked slightly transparent. White sashes and
clothing that looked as if the fabric had been made of ground pearls adorned
her, and complimented her pale complexion. "I am the goddess, Ariadne."
She smiled to him, and gently raised a hand to the sky. The stars shone
brighter as the hand waved across the horizon, as if they were cued to do
so. Ryouga had a blank look on his face. "What? What are you doing
forgot about the towel and absent-mindedly allowed the rest of the broth to spill on his lap.
"You freed me from that rock, and for that I will
grant you your special wish, Ryouga. Though, I would have thought of something
better, myself." Ariadne smiled warmly, and faded out of sight. "Thank
For a brief minute, Ryouga didn't know what to say. "Something better?" he whispered to himself. Ryouga shrugged his shoulders and thought about his wish. "My wish!!" With tears in his eyes, Ryouga clutched his noodles and allowed the tears to fall. "Akari-chan and I will be.. oh, my happiness is soaring!" He then felt something tumble across his lap. Looking down in a curious manner, he spotted the plastic chopsticks that he had forgotten. Attached to them was a note. Ryouga shrugged again and read it:
"To my gracious Ryouga,
Thanks ever so much for freeing me. Next time, however, I would wish
for something more than mere plastic.
Ryouga froze and looked down at the noodles that lay crumpled in his lap. "Why me?."
Ranma 1/2: The Gods Must Hate Me - a fanfic by -------,---PIMoSDL------,--<@ (Ranma 1/2 is copyrighted by Rumiko Takahashi. I dont want to be sued, because any
character from Ranma 1/2 isnt mine. However, the others are.) Now, on with the show....
That poor guy, you mean he cant help getting lost? A woman, adorned in flowing violet robes, touched at a globe which displayed the image of Hibiki Ryouga, asleep in Akanes bed in the form of a small black piglet, and watched it flicker away. Hes been to Jusenkyou, hasnt he? But she just thinks hes a pet... The woman chuckled. Now THATS interesting... and WHAT did he wish for, again? Ariadne sighed, and put her hand over her forehead, as if she had a headache.
Legally, Chantall, he wished for a pair of chopsticks.
Legally? What does that mean? Chantall raised a hand idly and two glasses of iced tea appeared before the women. She motioned for Ariadne to take a glass before taking her own, sipping slowly.
Well, he was looking through this HUGE backpack, and then he wished on a star that he and some girl named Akari would have love everlasting. Ariadne looked down at her tea and blushed, embarrassed. I heard all of that when I was stuck in that rock.
So what was the problem, then? Chantall leaned back in her seat as she sipped at her tea a bit more.
He canceled it, and wished that he could find his chopsticks... Ariadne frowned and sighed to herself. There wasnt a thing that I could do, it was what he asked for.
Well, we cant let this spread, hed be a laughing stock for the rest of the gods, and theyd never stop playing with the poor guy... Chantall touched the globe again to look at Ryouga, who was running at the time. Yeesh, HOW long did it take for him to find the bathroom again?
Ariadne grinned. You know WHY he cant find his way anywhere, right?
Well, you know that gerbil that Lilandras been playing with for the past 16 years? Ariadne scratched her chin and took bigger sips of her tea.
You mean to tell me that gerbils a P-chan?
Yep. Ariadne finished her drink and stretched out. Cruel, isnt it? She does that with his whole family, except for the dog. I mean, its almost as if its our duty to at least grant the poor soul one extra wish. She looked thoughtfully at her glass.
Yeah, hes cute enough to deserve it.
Chantall made a hand gesture, and the globe zoomed in on Ryouga. What
do we know about this Akari? Ariadne sighed, Well, we cant
make any action to find her in the present, what were gonna do is
already against the rules as it is. The second we go past surveillance,
itd be monitored by the higher-ups. In fact, in order to avoid getting
caught, wed have to slip away quickly, and then come back.
Chantall nodded in agreement, and rested her chin on her hand. Well, I know a couple of people that owe me some favors, so that wont be a problem, but finding information will indeed be the hardest part. Well, what if we go through the archives? Nobody cares about those, and wed find her faster! Now, like I said, what do we know about this Akari girl?
Ariadne thought a bit. Well, before Ryouga was looking for his chopsticks, I overheard him saying that Akari loves him the way he is... and then he was wishing for Akari to be happy with him.
Chantall stood up, holding her drink. Well, thats simple, we can search the archives on Ryouga here, and find a girl that says that she cares about him. Ugh, I hate looking through those, its like watching somebodys bad home movies... but since I admire the guy, Ill do it. How do you think we should go about doing this?
Chantall shrugged. Well, we can watch them in fast forward, and look for something that looks like a girlfriend, I guess.
Ariadne nodded. Chronological order, I suppose. Hey, we can make a day of it-- take in some popcorn, and watch stuff in fast-forward! Great! She bolted upward and got ready to run to get food, when Chantall stopped her.
One minute, theres just one thing that I have to know..
What is it? Ariadne folded her arms.
How the HELL did you get stuck in a rock? It was Chantalls turn to fold her arms.
Well... I was trying to get back at this guy for
grabbing my chest... and I was so mad that I misplaced a couple of words
in my spell...
Ariadne loved to eat. In fact, she even made an unconscious habit to never get tired of certain foods, no matter how much of them she ate. However, after hours of watching Ryougas life in fast-forward, she had long since become tired of popcorn. By this time, even the smell of popcorn would send her to the bathroom, ready to lose her lunch (or it would, if goddesses had bodily waste). Lazily, she summoned the next tape and continued to watch it in the same fashion.
Ariadne sighed, trying to keep her attention span focused. At LEAST were coming towards the end. That means that we MUST find some clue of this Akari girl, right Chantall? There was no answer. Chantall? Ariadne looked to the right, to find Chantall snoozing peacefully. Hey, wake up! You said you would help me! Chantall still didnt respond. Slightly annoyed, Ariadne bapped Chantall on the head. Wake up, you lazy, lazy woman! You said you would help me!
By this time, Chantall had long since woken up, in a rather irate mood. Raising her hand in a shamanist fashion, she summoned a small burst of lightning to Ariadne, waiting gleefully for it to hit its target. The lightning struck dead on, in between Ariadnes eyes.
What the-- now youre asking for it! Ariadne made a series of gestures as she began to chant quietly... as she did so, she glanced over to the video screen, and noticed a girl with Ryouga, in a boat. Ariadne stopped and pointed to the screen. There it is! Hes on a date, or something! She did this, not noticing the sudden burst of blizzard that erupted out of nowhere, purging the seat that Chantall was sitting on, and then knocking Chantall through the wall ahead.
Ariadne stood and dragged Chantall out of the wall, pulling the goddess to a seat on her left. Chantall kicked Ariadne and yelled, I zap you with a small lightning spell, and you hit me with a level three ice spell? What were you thinking?
Hey, you KNOW how bad my temper is! Just be lucky that I only chanted half of it, or youd be through the wall ahead of the one you just broke through, for sure! Chantall began to say something, when Ariadne spoke again. BUT, I think I found Ryougas lady love! Lets watch this part, okay?
Chantall calmed down after hearing this bit of news. All right, then lets watch it! She willed the footage to play again, as they listened to the red-headed girl:
Is there somewun youre in WUV with, P-chan?
Whaa--? How did you--
Why I know EVERYTHING about you darling - your likes, your dislikes, that you turn into a little black pig..
You know, and.. yet you still want me?
I WHAT? *fast-forward*
That you and I were meant to be!
Ariadne smiled largely. All right, lets go to the part in the boat, well confirm it there. Chantall nodded, as the footage proceeded:
Face it, Im the only one that doesnt mind that you turn into a little black pig! *mute*
Chantall squealed with delight. Eeee, Ariadne, this is great! I already feel like weve done a great good in this boys life! Cant you just feel the warmth all over?
Sure can! Now lets get to work!
You said it! Lets go!
The two females nodded in unison and left the room, not
noticing what the rest of the video displayed.
The stars flickered peacefully above Nerima, over a slumbering Tendou Dojo, and through the window of a sleeping Akane, with sleeping P-chan close at her side. An argent mist prowled through the window, effortlessly, and stopped above Ryouga. Slowly, he woke, not believing what he saw. Before him, hovered the beautiful Ariadne, whom he recognized, and behind her, floated Chantall. Ariadne twisted in her most graceful manner, before bowing to touch Ryougas mouth shut, so that he would not utter a thing.
Waving hello, she blew a kiss to a blushing Ryouga, and brought her companion through the floor beneath, waving goodbye. Ryouga grunted, careful not to wake Akane, and then nuzzled against her chest, returning to his slumber.
Why hello, Ryouga-kun, what are you doing here this morning? Kasumi beamed and bowed slightly. Would you like something to eat, so that you can wait for Akane to come home?
Ryouga instinctively placed a hand behind his neck, and stuttered, Oh, ah- sure, Kasumi-san, that would be wonderful! He laughed to himself, and followed the oldest Tendou daughter to the table.
You just sit here, and dont go anywhere, all right? Kasumi watched Ryouga sit and then headed for the kitchen. Ill be right back. How does miso soup, fish and rice sound?
Ryouga stammered through another sentence. Oh, th-that would be fine, Kasumi-san, thanks. He really didnt like being any sort of a burden to Kasumi, which explained why he was so jittery around her this morning. Sure, he could treat Ranma rudely; that was one thing. But treating Kasumi rudely was never much of an option for anyone, especially Ryouga. If he were to be rude to any of Akanes relatives, it would quickly destroy the respect that she had for him, and Heaven forbid that THAT would ever happen. He had nothing against the Tendous anyway. Just to Ranma, and maybe his father, too. He still hadnt decided.
Ryouga stared out the window, as Kasumi rushed back with several bowls. He bowed deeply as she placed each one in front of him, and thanked her heartily. Now dont be shy, Ryouga-kun, just eat all you like, Kasumi said, as she stood all the way up again.
Of course, Kasumi-san, I would never want your delightful cooking to go to waste. Ryouga picked up the pair of hashi before him, and began to eat. He stopped himself from eating too quickly (so that he would not appear as such a pig), but also made sure not to pick at his food. Taking timed bites of rice, and then a sip of soup now and then, he allowed his mind to wander. He wondered mostly about what Ariadne was doing here, and what she was up to. Well, maybe she was granting a wish for somebody... This was the first thought to enter his mind, simply because he only knew her as a wish-granter. That is how the two met, at any rate.
Well, who would have gotten a wish, then? Ryouga thought about this, for a time. Could it have been Mr. Tendou? Or perhaps Mr. Saotome? No, wait... who is the only one living here that is always the center of events? Could it be Ranma? Then what would he have wished for? Ryouga chewed tentatively at a piece of fish, and thought about this. Oh no! What if he wished for Akanes affection? Why, what else would he REALLY wish for? That means that she would be brainwashed into loving that idiot, and not of her own free will! Ryouga felt the anger boiling in his veins.... he tried his best not to slam down the hashi on the table in front of him, and to his own luck, he hadnt broken it. He just made a loud noise, before realizing what had happened. Okay, just get a hold of yourself, there, guy. Caaaaaaalm down. Making an effort to breathe slower, Ryouga noticed Kasumi at the doorway.
Er, y-yes, Kasumi-san? Ryouga wondered what she would say about his fit. Being scolded by Kasumi was the worst punishment that any resident of the Tendou Dojo could receive, with Akane and Nabikis combined wrath tied at a close second.
Would you like some tea with your breakfast? Kasumi tipped her head to one side, in an inquisitive manner.
*Whew* That was close. Oh,
Kasumi-san, that would be wonderful, thanks! Ryouga watched her leave
the room once more, before focusing on the swirling
clouds off in the distance. Hm. I guess it isnt as sunny a day as I thought it would be. Ryouga didnt realize how right he was.
Welcome home, Akane-chan! Kasumi was quick to rush out of the kitchen to her dripping younger sister. Hurry up and give me your coat before you catch a cold. Ill draw a bath for you in a minute, okay? Wheres Ranma? Kasumi wrinkled her nose at the turbulent rainstorm outside.
Right here. An red-headed girl trudged in, and stood at the entrance, glaring at the puddle that formed under her feet. Kasumi blinked largely at Ranma and rushed to a closet. Within seconds, Kasumi returned with a huge pink towel.
Here, you go and dry yourself off with this. Kasumi attacked Ranma with the towel, wrapping it all around the girls body, and pushing her off to the dining room. I would draw you a bath right now, but I told Akane that I would start one up for her first. Im sorry, Ranma-kun.
Sokay. The reply fell on no ears, as Kasumi had already left to go start a bath. Ranma shrugged her shoulders and sat down at the table. For a good while, she curled up in her towel, and wished that she could just hop in the bath tub. With a sigh, Ranma stretched her legs and stared at her toes. About ten minutes later she had begun to notice the person who was already occupying that room.
He had kept a steady glare on Ranma, even as he, er, she, had entered the room. Through the whole time, he had debated about whether or not he should pick a fight right there. How dare she not notice him! He was sitting only meters away from her, and yet she stared at her toes! Ryouga knew what he would say, and decided that the time that had already passed had been enough. Ryouga felt a queasy feeling in his stomach, that resembled giddiness. He was feeling strangely elated because for once, he had control over the situation. It was in his hands to decide when and where he would ruin Ranmas day, and that thought made Ryouga want to giggle. He cleared his throat, and smiled evilly, just for a second.
Hello, Saotome, he had said in a surprisingly gentle voice, My, dont you look rather cute, all bundled up in that little pink towel? Ryouga smiled until he had realized whom he was talking to. In disbelief, Ryouga tried to grasp the situation.
Id hit you right now, P-chan, but I wouldnt want to bruise that sexy little face of yours, Ranma had retorted, in an equally sugary tone.
What?!? Ryouga hit himself
in the head. What the hell was going on? Why was
he flirting-- no, flirting is something you do with somebody you have a crush on -- why was he being so nice? He slammed his fist onto the top if his head, as if trying to knock himself violently out of reality.
Hey, what are you doing? Dont hit yourself! Ranma rushed to Ryougas side, prying his hand from his head. Something inside of Ranma poked at her stomach, as she recalled the things that she had just said to Ryouga. Oh God... Ranmas thoughts screamed in realization. She had called Ryouga sexy. Worse than that, why hadnt Ryouga killed her yet? Hell, why hadnt SHE killed herself yet? Ranma searched for an answer. She recalled what Ryouga had said to her a minute ago. No way... I must be tired, or something....
Ranma wasnt tired at all. In fact, she was far from it. Then, Ranma thought about what Ryouga had said again. Part of her wanted to scream. That part of her was fading fast, under the realization that Ryouga had called her cute. He called me, cute... I dont believe it. That thought looped back and forth in her mind, as if it was being steered away from something else, in desperation. The thought just revolved, like a merry-go-round - how it would bob up and down, but still maintain its journey in endless circles. Something felt wrong here, but Ranma didnt think about it anymore. She only acted according to how she felt at the moment.
Oh, you called me cute! Eeeee!
Whaaa? Hey, what are you doooiii--mmph!
A kiss. And undeniably undenied one, at that (from both parties).
Can you please do me a favor and tell Ranma-kun to go ahead and take his bath? Hes in the dining room. Kasumi nodded her head to the wet pile of laundry that had been soaked in the rain. I have to take care of all these clothes before making dinner, so could you...?
Sure thing, Kasumi. Ill tell him. Akane hummed to herself a little louder, and changed course to the dining room. Breaking the tune that was going through her mind, the words, Whaaa? Hey, what are you doooiii--mmph! had taken surface. Akane thought to herself, Was that Ryouga-kun? Her questions were answered as she walked in the doorway of the dining room. There, stood a sight that she would have never imagined to imagine to think about: Ranma and Ryouga in a liplock, plain and simple.
Leaving the room, and turning away from the scene, she collected herself. Why would that ever happen? Akane dismissed it as her being tired (a trend with the people living in this house) and re-entered the room, only to find the same scene. She couldnt find it in herself to go near them. Akane left the room, quietly and headed to her own. She passed Kasumi on her way again, and didnt even notice her. Kasumi debated whether or not she should follow Akane -- she looked a little strange -- however, she decided against it, and hurried back to the kitchen. On her way, she noticed Ranma and Ryouga in the dining room. Kasumis eyes widened. She couldnt believe what she was seeing (and who would blame her?). Kasumi was too busy examining the scene that she didnt get a chance to examine the wall that was heading straight for her. The two collided almost as fiercely as Ranma and Ryouga were kissing, and Kasumi was the one to succumb. She floated to the ground, and sat back up, quickly. Ranma and Ryouga turned around.
Kasumi! The pair said in very surprised voices. Ranma headed to Kasumi and helped her up.
Hey, are you okay? Ranma was concerned for Kasumi, but at the moment, was more concerned about whether or not she saw the kiss. She watched Kasumi straighten her apron.
Oh, ah yes, Im all right. Thank you for asking, Ranma. She searched for something to say, and looked towards Ryouga. Ryouga-kun, will you be staying for dinner? We would love to have you.
Ryouga stammered. He had already felt bad for having Kasumi take care of him all day, but he didnt want to turn down the invitation. Ah, sure, Kasumi, I would love that, heh heh. He wondered how Kasumi had fallen down, and blushed as he got an idea about what could have caused it.
Okay, then Ill be sure to make enough for you, too. Kasumi paused. Oh, and Ranma, you can take your bath now. Akanes finished. She watched Ranma nod, and then left to seek some privacy in the kitchen. What in Kamis name is going on? she wondered to herself.
Wait a minute, what in the HELL did I do with Ryouga? Ranma stood with a start, and leaped to dry himself. I always thought Ryouga was a little pervert, the way he slept with Akane, but now... Ranma said this between clenched teeth as he dressed at amaguriken speed. Ranma stampeded out of the bathroom, and rushed back to the scene of the kiss. He sported an evil look as he spotted Ryouga, still sitting by the dinner table. Ranma stomped a foot on the ground to get Ryougas attention.
Turn around, you hentai! Ranma growled as he stalked towards Ryouga. I wanna know JUST what you did to get me to kiss you, you sick little-- Ranma realized something at that moment. Ryouga was indeed very responseless. In fact, he was in a stupor.
I kiss-kiss-k-k-k-kkkissed.... Ranma.... These words were repeated by a pale Ryouga, Ranma observed, as he held the fanged boys collar. Ranma felt his anger slowly fading. Ryouga didnt look too happy about the kiss either, and he was obviously just as confused as Ranma was.
Now thats not fair. Ranma sighed and left the room.
Okay, Akane, just hold on a second! Ranma came bursting out the gates, with a piece of toast in his mouth. The second his eyes met Akanes, he stopped running. Akane blinked a second, before taking the toast.
Those crumbs on your face are soooo, cute, Ranma, Akane mumbled as she dropped her schoolbag. Ranma blinked. The pair stood in front of each other for a good five minutes.
Then, as soon as Ranma sneezed, Akane jumped to kiss him. In the back of Ranmas mind, a little warning bell rung, but it was promptly ignored by the sensation of Akanes tongue slipping into Ranmas mouth. He liked what was happening, but why did it happen? He was confused, so for a bit, he answered Akanes kiss very enthusiastically. However, after that bit, he felt a stinging sensation on his leg. This made Ranma jump back so quickly that he slammed himself into the wall behind him, promptly knocking him silly. The source of the sting bweeed and hurled himself at a despondent Ranma.
Akane wasnt fazed. Ranma obviously was. Akane continued her attack, pushing her pet pig aside. Ranma just sat there.
Are you all right, Ranma? Akane smiled and pushed Ranma back down on the futon. Ranmas mind was still trying to register everything that had happened during the day before and this morning, and what Akane was doing didnt help. Ranma decided that she was too nice... but he couldnt keep his eyes off of her. He slowly, sat up and opened his mouth to speak.
Yeah. Ranma rubbed his head, and glanced back at Ryouga, who was still glaring at him.
Akane broke any traces of silence. So, uhm, is there anything you need? I can get it for you: something to eat, a drink, another blanket.. She waited for Ranma to say something.
Ranmas mind was spinning. Somewhere, it spoke to him, saying, No! No! No! Nooooooo! Dont even think about it! So, Ranma didnt think about it. He did it. Yeah, I DO need something, Akane... She lifted an eyebrow, and watched Ranma move towards her. He pulled her quickly, almost violently towards himself, and planted a kiss right across her lips. Akane responded by wrapping her arms around his shoulders, and the pair forgot about the third party in the room. That third party was holding a bucket of water.
I dont think so, Ranma! Ryouga splashed Ranma with the contents and folded his arms. Ranma pulled back from Akane and turned to Ryouga. She squealed, and jumped towards him, heading into an open embrace.
Akane was stupefied. Lifting the dresser nearby, she shot malicious looks at the cuddling couple. Ranma... Ryouga... no BAKA! She successfully spiked the dresser and its contents off of the couples heads. After grinning in satisfaction, she took a kettle of water, and poured it over Ranma. Come here, sexy. Akane opened her arms and watched as Ranma practically launched himself at Akane, clinging to her waistline.
Hello, beautiful. Hows it going? Ranma smiled, and Akane stuck a tongue out at an irritated Ryouga.
Raaaannnmmmaaaaa! Ryouga screeched. Why, you TWO-TIMER! Ryouga splashed another bucket of water across Ranma, witnessed the change, and wrapped his arms around her.
This continued for a considerable time, with shouts of Ranma you SLUT! and Akane, you stay away from her, shes MINE! and of course, Darling! *splash* Beautiful!. The room was slowly being destroyed, as all three of the pieces of furniture that inhabited it had been sent via air mail to either Ranma, Ryouga, or Akane.
Do you think thats going to help, Chantall? The higher-ups are SURE to hear about this any day now, we may lose our status, and youre bawling like a baby! Ariadne looked worriedly back at the fighting trio and raised her hands in the air. I should have stayed in that rock. If I would have known that it would come to THIS... Chantall sighed and slammed her head into the ground to keep herself quiet. She sat up painfully, and began to speak. You know, this is just so sickeningly ironic that these two people were fighting over the same person. Ariadne, we are definitely screwed.
Ariadne shook her head and put her face in her hands. This is not what I worked for all my life: to play good Samaritan to a couple of weird mortals, only to get my license revoked. Hmph. Well see if I ever do anything out of kindness again... if we could just find a way around this to make it look good... then wed be in the clear.
Chantall nodded her head in agreement. I hear you. She looked back at the three adolescents, who were still fighting (big surprise there). She shook her head again.
But what do we do to help them out?
You mean, what do we do to save our butts? Ariadne poked Chantall on the shoulder.
Aww, you always have to be so anal about these things.
Im beginning to sound like Kunou, Ranma thought, as he was once again thrust into Akanes arms. He began to wonder about who he would end up with, in the end. Ranma was so deep in thought that he barely noticed the water that splashed him, over and over again, and the changes that took affect afterwards.
And what would THAT be? It had better be good! Ariadne sat up straighter in her seat, because she was uncomfortable.
The answer was sitting right there, all this time! Come with me.
All right. But can you tell me before we take off?
Hey, all of you, be quiet! The voice didnt seem to have an origin, but it was as loud and clear as a bell. Do you hear me? All of you! Two familiar faces (to Ryouga, anyway) materialized before the three martial artists.
It seems that you have a conflict of interest. Chantall stood regally, to be sure that she looked intimidating to the three. Her efforts were not in vain.
Ryouga opened his mouth. Ariadne, what are you doing here?
Well, Ryouga-darling, there was this little problem with your wish, that we felt that we had to fix...
You mean the chopsticks? Ryouga said, with a glare to Ariadne.
Dont glare at me like that! Im a goddess! Chantall turned to look at Ariadne, who was now becoming angry. You have no idea how much trouble we went to get your true love to fall in love with you! This Akari girl here, is a very lucky girl.
Ryouga, Akane and Ranma facefaulted violently. Ranma was the first to recover from the impact. You mean to tell me that Im acting all funny on Ryouga and Akane, because you thought that I was Akari???
Ariadne realized her mistake and bigsweated. Er.. I just thought that you were only Ranma in your male form... I thought... uh-oh.
Ranma cracked his knuckles. Then Im right! You mean to tell me that Im in love with Ryouga here, because you thought that I was Akari! Where in the hell did you get a stupid idea like that? Why didnt you two cast some sort of spell first, to find out who we were?
You just dont know how hard it is for you to get extra wishes, do you, Ranma? Chantall yelled, in an angry tone. We were doing this as a favor for you two, but since you dont even appreciate it... I guess well have to obliterate you.
Ariadne rolled her eyes. I dont know who shes trying to fool, saying that stuff. She looked over to Akane, Ranma and Ryouga, who had face-faulted again. Er, nevermind... She decided to take the matter into her own hands. Okay, maybe you WILL be obliterated, and maybe you wont. It depends on how you are going to cope with these wishes.
Ranma was the first to regain his composure, again. You two are just trying to save your OWN butts, arent you? You know, I bet you screwed up really bad, or something, and were paying for it.
Ariadne and Chantall blushed, as Akane butted into the conversation. Wait a minute, if you guys just wanted to give Ryouga some happiness or whatever, then how come Ranma is in love with me?
It was Ariadne and Chantalls turn to facefault, and they did it rather elegantly. Chantall rose and knocked on Akanes head as if it were a door. Hello? Who was at the window the other night, wishing for Ranma to love her?
Akanes cheeks brightened to a deep shade of pink. Well, I didnt think that it would work... er... She sat down on a pile of broken dresser. Doh.
Ranma turned to Akane, upset. What do you mean, Doh? Are you saying that you think it was a mistake?
Akanes eyes widened, as she pulled Ranma in for a hug. No! I didnt mean that at all, Ranma. Its just that... it was a mistake--
Ohh, you see? Then you think that Im a mistake! Ohh, cried Ranma as he began to sulk.
You didnt let me finish! Akane interjected. It was a mistake, with all this stuff going on with R-youg-a! Her nose wrinkled in a sneer as she said his name. Ryouga replied by sticking his tongue out at Akane.
Yeah, well, it doesnt matter, I love Ranma, too, you know! Ryouga tossed another bucket of water over Ranma, and kidnapped her from Akanes arms.
Hey! Well, so do Shampoo, Ukyou, and Kodachi, but hes still engaged to me, and hes mine! I dont care what you say! Akane tossed some more water over Ranma, and everybody in the room gasped. Ariadne and Chantall had covered their mouths, Ranmas eyes grew larger, and Ryouga had frozen in place. All of them brought their gazes over to see what Akane was going to do next.
Akane hadnt moved since she saw the change. She realized that she had used the wrong container, splashing cold water over both Ranma and Ryouga. In a stupor, she observed the room around her: the miniature flood in the middle of the floor, the broken furniture, the shredded futon, and the plastic flowers that were wrapped around Ryouga- er, P-chans head. She took in the surroundings, and finally dropped the bucket.
It hit the floor with a pang.
And then, Akane laughed.
At first, it was quiet giggle, but soon it escalated to a psychotic cackle, rivaling Kodachis. She rolled across the floor, holding her sides. Of COURSE this would happen, it all makes sense! Akane pounded on the floor with her fists, making a squish-squish sound, as some water flew out from under her blows. Why, everything else is so messed up that all of this makes sense now! Why WOULDNT Ryouga be P-chan? From now on, I should just count on everything to screw up! Akane laughed so hard that her head began to throb. What else could she do? Chantall was the first to act, moving towards Akane, and casting a sleep spell on her.
There. So, I suppose after she wakes up, well take care of this. Ranma and Ryouga nodded.
Heres some Japanese words that you should know (in case you dont): Hashi - Chopsticks Tadaima - Im home! Onee-chan - Sis
Now, I guess its time to say the this is my first fanfic speech. Well, I wont, because it isnt. But, it IS the first of my fanfics that I got prereaders for. If you liked it, E-mail me at email@example.com and tell me why. If you hated it, E-mail me and tell my why, too! Comments and criticism are very welcome, if not wanted. Many, many MANY thanks to Enaka, Greg, FriTz, and Ronin for checking it out first! I really appreciate their support. Thanks for reading!
-------,---Pimpin Imperial Majestrix of SD-ism Laura------,--<@ (Have a nice day.)